Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

WWE monitoring US-Iran situation with two Saudi Arabia shows set for next weekend - New York Post

I see through liars

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand how hurricane paths work

Can Benadryl cause a false positive for benzodiazepines?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know who the president of Turkey really is

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

How can someone express their love for a guy without using words? What are some actions that can convey love and care?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Rafael Devers Made Worst Announcement For Red Sox Fans - Sports Illustrated

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Exclusive | Nile Rodgers recalls becoming ‘really close’ with the late Sly Stone: ‘He was living in a car’ - New York Post

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

How do the police verify the authenticity of an online profile? What methods do they use to determine if a profile is real or fake?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Supercomputer simulation reveals how merging neutron stars form black holes and powerful jets - Phys.org

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Woman on trial for poison mushroom killings says she was trying to fix "bland" meal - CBS News

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Quis sed officia eum accusantium animi.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have a reading level above third grade

I actually pay taxes

What is your age now, and what age do you prefer to stay at forever?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I can count

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I can read

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t buy bullshit

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write